A Mets fan, a Braves fan, a Yankees fan, and a Red Sox fan are climbing a mountian. On the way to the top, each is arguing about how loyal they are to their team and what they would do for that team.

Upon reaching the top, the Mets fan shouts, "This is for the Mets!!!" and throw’s himself off the top of the mountian.

Next the Braves fan yells, "I love Atlanta....This is for you Braves!!" and he, too, jumps off.

And then the Red Sox fan reaches the top and screams, "This is for EVERYONE!!" and pushes the Yankee fan off the mountian.

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A Woman was warming up for her Gold Medal beach doubles volleyball match one afternoon when her spiked ball rolled into some bushes.

She went into the bushes to look for it and found a frog stuck in a trap.

The frog said to her, "If you release me from this trap, I will grant you three wishes."

The woman freed the frog and then the frog said, "Thank you, but I failed to mention that there was a condition to your wishes. Whatever you wish for, your opponents in this Championship Match will get ten times more or better!" The woman said, "That would be okay."

For her first wish, she wanted to be the hardest spiker on the Volleyball Tour.

The frog warned her, "You do realize that this wish will also make your 2 female opponents in this match the hardest spikers in the world, their hits will come at you with amazing speed."

The woman replied, "That will be okay because I will still be a strong hitter in my own right."

So, KAZAM-she's the most powerful spiker on the Volleyball Tour.

For her second wish, she wanted to have the highest vertical jump on the volleyball tour. The frog said, "That will make your opponents impossible to beat as they will now be able to jump high and hit hard, much more than your abilities. You will lose your match for sure."

"The woman said, "That will be okay because I will still be an amazing player."

So, KAZAM-she has the highest vertical jump of any women on the Volleyball Tour!

The frog then inquired about her third wish, and she answered, "I'd like to have a mild heart attack."

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The psychology teacher had just finished a lecture on mental health and had proceeded to give an oral quiz to the students. Speaking specifically about manic depression, the teacher asked, "How would you diagnose a patient who walks back and forth screaming at the top of his lungs one minute, then sits in a chair weeping uncontrollably the next?"

A young man in the rear of the room raised his hand and answered, "A basketball coach?"

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A man walks into a bar where the patrons are laughing together.

"What's so funny?" he asks.

The bartender answers, "Oh, we're just taking the names of our hometown baseball teams and tweaking them so they come out badly."

"Here's mine," says a woman at the bar, "The New York Yank-Me's!"

"Mine's the Houston Disastros!" says another bar patron.

"The Seattle Moroners!"

"The Chicago Flubs!"

The bartender looks at the new guy and says, "So how can you change your home squad's name so that it sounds like a joke of a team?"

The man looks up at the bartender sadly and sighs, "Oh, that's easy; you can just call them the Detroit Tigers."

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Golfer: "Think I'm going to drown myself in the lake."
Caddy: "Think you can keep your head down that long?"

Golfer: "I'd move heaven and earth to break 100 on this course."
Caddy: "Try heaven, you've already moved most of the earth."

Golfer: "Do you think my game is improving?"
Caddy: "Yes sir, you miss the ball much closer now."

Golfer: "Do you think I can get there with a 5 iron?"
Caddy: "Eventually."

Golfer: "You've got to be the worst caddy in the world."
Caddy: "I don't think so sir. That would be too much of a coincidence."

Golfer: "Please stop checking your watch all the time. It's too much of a distraction."
Caddy: "It's not a watch - it's a compass."

Golfer: "How do you like my game?"
Caddy: "Very good sir, but personally, I prefer golf."

Golfer: "Do you think it's a sin to play on Sunday?"
Caddy: "The way you play, sir, it's a sin on any day."

Golfer: "This is the worst course I've ever played on."
Caddy: "This isn't the golf course. We left that an hour ago."

Golfer: "That can't be my ball, it's too old."
Caddy: "It's been a long time since we teed off, sir."

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