Sports Jokes Humor And Satire
Archives 

Show All

  • 2009
  • 2008
  • 2007
    • December
    • November
    • October
    • September
    • August
    • July
    • June
    • May
    • April
      • Silly One Liners.
        04/30/07
        Q: Why are basketball players messy eaters?
        A: They're always dribbling.

        Q: What's the difference between a basketball player and a dog?
        A: One drools, the other dribbles.

        Q: What did Bobby Knight say about coaching the 1980 U.S. Olympics basketball team

      • The Quarterback.
        04/28/07
        Al Davis had put together the perfect Raiders team for 1998. The only thing he was missing was a good quarterback. He had scouted all the colleges, and even the high schools, and he couldn't find a ringer quarterback that would ensure a SuperBowl win.

        One night, watching CNN, he saw

      • Talking Dog
        04/26/07
        A man walks into a bar with a dog. The bartender says, "You can't bring that dog in here."

        "You don't understand," says the man. "This is no regular dog, he can talk."

        "Listen, pal," says the bartender. "If that dog can tal

      • Painless Birth.
        04/25/07
        A married couple go to hospital together to have their baby delivered. When they arrive, the doctor says they have just taken delivery of a new machine which transfers a portion of the mother's pain to the father.

        "Would you be willing to try it out?" asks the doctor.
      • Doctor's Orders
        04/24/07
        A middle management executive has to take on some sport, by his doctor's orders, so he decides to play tennis.

        After a couple of weeks his secretary asks him how he's doing. "It's going fine, " the manager says. "When I'm on the court and I see the ball

      • Yogi Berra Quotes.
        04/23/07
        "Always go to other people's funerals, otherwise they won't come to yours."

        "Baseball is 90 percent mental. The other half is physical."

        "If the people don't want to come out to the park, nobody's gonna stop them."

        &q

      • Old Hockey Injury.
        04/23/07
        Jim came to work one day, limping something awful. One of his co-workers, Ted, noticed and asked Jim what happened. Jim replied, "Oh, nothing. It's just an old hockey injury that acts up once in a while."

        Ted said, "Gee, I never knew you played hockey."
      • Soccer Wisdom.
        04/21/07
        "My parents have been there for me. Ever since I was about seven.' DAVID BECKHAM

        "I would not be bothered if we lost every game, as long as we won the league.' MARK VIDUKA

        "We lost because we didn't win." RONALDO

        "I've had

      • Football Wedding.
        04/21/07
        Two guys are talking about their boss's upcoming wedding.
        One says, "It's ridiculous, he's rich, but he's 93 years old, and she's just 26! What kind of a wedding is that?"

        The other says, "Well, we have a name for it in my family."
      • Nothing To Nothing.
        04/21/07
        As in many homes on New Year's Day, my wife and I faced the annual conflict of which was more important - the football games on television, or the dinner itself. To keep peace, I ate dinner with the rest of the family, and even lingered for some pleasant after-dinner conversation before retirin

      • You Stink.
        04/21/07
        It was a particularly tough football game, and nerves were on edge. The home team had been the victim of three or four close calls, and they were now trailing the visitors by a touch-down and a field goal. When the official called yet another close one in the visitors' favor, the home quarterba

      • 25 cents.
        04/21/07
        A guy took his girlfriend to her first football game. Afterward he asked her how she liked the game.

        "I liked it, but I couldn't understand why they were killing each other for 25 cents," she said.

        "What do you mean?" he asked.

        "Well, ev

      • Who's On First - From Abbot And Costello
        04/21/07
        LOU: I love baseball. When we get to St. Louis, will you tell me the guys' name on the team so when I go to see them in that St. Louis ball park I'll be able to know those fellows?

        BUD: All right. But you know, strange as it may seems, they give ball players nowadays very peculi

      • Mental Health.
        04/21/07
        The psychology instructor had just finished a lecture on mental health and had proceeded to give an oral quiz to the freshman class.

        Speaking specifically about manic depression, the instructor asked, "How would you diagnose a patient who walks back and forth screaming at the top of

      • Not A white Sox Fan.
        04/21/07
        Two boys are playing hockey on an inlet on a pond in suburban Chicago when one is attacker by a rabid Rottweiler. Thinking quickly, the other boy takes his stick and wedges it down the dog's collar and twists, breaking the dog's neck. A reporter who is strolling by sees the incident and ru

      • Baseball In Heaven
        04/21/07
        Two old men had been best friends for years, and they both live to their early 90's, when one of them suddenly falls deathly ill. His friend comes to visit him on his deathbed, and they're reminiscing about their long friendship, when the dying man's friend asks, "Listen, when yo

      • Peanuts.
        04/21/07
        A doctor at an insane asylum decided to take his patients to a baseball game.

        For weeks in advance, he coached his patients to respond to his commands.

        When the day of the game arrived, everything seemed to be going well. As the National Anthem started.......the doctor yelled,